Main image via Medium + Clarity Clinic
Have you ever tried a pick up line or had a pick up line said to you? Did it work?
We’re assuming that it probably didn’t because many of us who are single see pick up lines as cheesy or would rather stay single because it’s too much of a bother to flirt.
A new study however has found that “not knowing how to flirt” is actually a main reason as to why people are single.
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The Personality and Individual Differences journal recently published a new study that found that in order to attract prospective partners, people need to know how to flirt and how to understand signals of interest. And of course, they have to be willing to put in sufficient amounts of time and effort to get successful results.
Though there are plenty of individuals who are happy being single, Menelaos Apostolou of the University of Nicosia, Cyprus has found that roughly half of single people are involuntarily single. This means that they’d like to have a partner but are having difficulty doing so.
The study’s author predicted that poor flirting skills, low ability in recognising flirting signs, a lack of effort and a high degree of choosiness correlates with a greater likelihood of being involuntarily single and with longer periods of singlehood.
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Of course, the ongoing pandemic has not made it easy in the love department and has put a damper on flirting, dating, chatting and getting up-close and personal with someone new.
But as we’ve learnt in the past year, life goes on.
To test out his theory on how “not knowing how to flirt” impacts singlehood, Menelaos gathered 1,228 men and women whose average age was about 30.
In his study, the author found that of the 48% of participants who were single, 47% indicated that their relationship status was down to difficulties attracting a partner. 30% shared that they were “between relationships” and 23% said that they preferred to be single.
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According to Psych News Daily, Menelaos used self-report surveys to assess flirting skills, abilities to read signals of interest, effort and choosiness, in his study.
Participants were required to respond to a series of statements with a scale of one to five and these included statements like “I do not know how to flirt”, “I totally lack the ability to pick up and interpret signals of interest”, “I dedicate all my energy to my romantic relationships” and “I am always very selective when choosing romantic partners”.
The final results of the survey showed that for participants who indicated that they were involuntarily single, the most important factor in their relationship status was by far their lack of flirting skills, followed by skills in perceiving signals of interest, “mating effort” and choosiness.
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The author however also noted that the participants may have been biased in their responses as some may not have wanted to admit that they’re bad at flirting.
Menelaos also shared that “reverse causation” may play a role as longer periods of singlehood may diminish flirting skills.
“We found that low scorers in flirting capacity, capacity to perceive signals of interest, and mating effort, were more likely to be involuntary single than in an intimate relationship, and more likely to experience longer spells of singlehood,” the author summarized.
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Now would definitely be the right time for someone to start flirting classes that actually teach single people how to have good conversations that aren’t filled with cheesy pick up lines.
We’d sign up immediately!
Do you think the study is right to say that not knowing how to flirt is the main reason people are single? Do you know how to flirt? Let us know!
Info via UNILAD
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